Here it goes again…

Nothing I say ever comes out right, does it?*

—
*not even that.

another note;

“Creative process usually accompanied by flash of insight, as reported by Darwin and Mozart. So the four phases would be Preparation, Incubation, Illumination and Verification, the middle two phases being highly debated in psychology. I don’t know why, but he’s so unassuming. He just sits there being an unassuming genius, and he just knows things. He doesn’t need to think, he knows. Is that admirable or scary? Several studies have found that incubation has no effect on solving a problem, no matter how varied the times are. Though it has been found to have an effect in children.”

I wonder to myself if I realised that I was writing that at the time.

an extra side note on my lecture notes saying;

“Hand is too sore to continue. Sorry Future Jonathan who is studying really really hard and is now pissed off with Past Self.”

Damn him indeed.

the city of Barcelona stretches below my feet like a child’s play mat and my toes wriggle over the edge of the stone yellow cliff. My arms are crucifixed in the middle of a swan dive and the wind teeters me on the edge of the blazing precipice. I smile and I leap, plummeting the several hundred feet before the hard summers breeze catches my arm and brings me soaring over the buildings and churches and cathedrals. Pockets of heat play at my feet and seagulls cry with jealousy as they circle below me. The sky and the sea melds and I feel vertigo from looking straight ahead.

Eventually it’s the vertigo that brings me to the ground. It’s the dizzying sense of going too far, of running too fast, and it’s terrifyingly amazing to fall all that distance.

–And, again, on another note, why why why ON MY ONE DAY OFF DOES IT HAVE TO START RAINING I WANTED TO READ BOOKS AND PLAY FRISBEE GODDAMNIT–

a motherfuckin bee in my motherfuckin room.

This is probably why I’m going to fail psychology. Ha ha ha I don’t really care anymore.

As the results have shown, gender is a significant attribute in a person’s spatial awareness whilst handedness is not.

The gender section of the experiment has showed that men are, characteristically, more aware of their surroundings and navigation than women are. This may seem of little use, but it could help the leader of an expedition choose who to entrust the map to, or to help a blind woman understand why she is finding it hard to cope compared to her similarly blind counterpart.

The handedness section of the experiment might not seem like it was worth it, but it does add knowledge to the list of things that is known about the mind. By doing this experiment and knowing that handedness does not affect spatial perception, another psychologist has been saved the time and effort to find out for themselves. This does not sound like much, but by knowing that this experiment has already been carried out, that psychologist will no longer have to do it and will move on to another subject of spatial awareness that will help further understanding of it. Again, this does not sound like much, but psychology cannot be filled with breakthrough after breakthrough, it has to be filled slowly and incrementally, with little segments of information gently increasing our knowledge of the brain like rain increases the volume of the ocean.

A problem found in the experiment would be the effect that the gender of the participant could have upon the handedness section of the experiment. By using two groups that have been proved to affect spatial ability in different ways, the results of the handedness experiment could have been skewed. However, the handedness experiment was not significant at all, so it is doubtful that the gender of the participant could have affected it to such a serious degree. Yet, it is something to consider in future iterations of this experiment, and in any experiment using two factors to govern an outcome.

When people see my tattoo, I tell them I’m a writer. When they ask me why it’s a quill and not a pen, I tell them that I don’t want to write. I want to fly.

After consultation with Mike and his friends, I have found a good number of things I can try to learn in my spare time:

Pick locks
Hotwire a car
Trick Bartending
Walk on my hands (in progress)
Learn to solve a rubiks cube
Whistle using my fingers (in progress)
Juggle
Touch-type
Sign Language
Second Language (Latin and Spanish were mentioned)
Learn to play Harmonica (pretty much covered already, but practice is good)
Read the I Ching
Shuffle cards
Learn the intricacies of a car engine
Learn and partake in graffiti art

I think all that would be a dandy number of useless tricks to pick up.

After about a month of playing, tousling, yelling and threats of severance, my hair is finally having a god day. The sun is out, and for the first time in God knows how long I’m not wearing my dirt green hoodie that seems perpetually attached to me. And, goddamit, I am looking GOOD.

My leather jacket, torn and faded and worn out with delightful imperfections, is shining dutifully in the cold-but-not-too-cold air and my cigarettes taste wonderful in the breeze. My hair dances and smoke wafts round my smiling lips as I let my mind drift and wander and dear me I’m having a bloody good day.

And then it rains.

Fuck it.

Consumption today:

Two slices of cheesecake (accumulating to approximately one third of the entire circle)

Two Crunch bars

One beer (Budweiser)

I should really come up with a better diet than that…